Co-sleeping and the can of worms

The can of worms...

Everyone has an opinion about whether or not sharing a room with a newborn is wise, safe, and healthy. But I must clarify... Co-sleeping means simply sharing a room, while bed-sharing (also known as family beds) is a sub-component of rooming in. Most people think of sharing a bed when they hear co-sleeping being discussed.

Here's my opinion and why I have it.  Co-sleeping (as in, rooming in) is a fantastic idea for newborns.  Nursing on demand coupled with new babies and trying to get acquainted with one another, learn what their cries mean, and all that goes with newbornism make it more practical for rooming in for those early days.  However, bed-sharing is an absolute no-no.  I say this with the caveat that I admit to falling asleep while nursing my son in bed.  However, he has never spent an entire night in our bed and neither has our daughter.  Mostly it is not for the fear of suffocation or any reason that is most frequently listed by most anti-bed-sharing folks.

Simply stated, I do not want to create a monster that will take over my sleeping space.  I paid a lot of money for my fantastic Sleep Number bed, and I don't want to share it with my little ones.  Selfish?  Not really.  I have given them each their own sleeping spaces, and I want them to use it.  I mean, siblings just don't get made when the other kids are sharing your bed every night.  At least, not in my world.

Children are very keen on adapting to change.  Good or bad.  They can and will adapt to being in a different room from the parents.  Just as, if given the chance to sleep in your bed every night (or even just when they are sick), they will adapt to that so that breaking the habit becomes more and more difficult.  Bottom line, a five-year-old simply does not need to be in bed with his/her parents.  I want my children to be individuated, independent, self-confident, etc.  Although I will not say that these traits cannot be imparted among children who sleep in a "family bed," I will say it's much easier to identify these traits among kids who have their own space.

Now, if you choose to comment on this blog, be nice.  This is just my opinion and why I choose this option among all child-rearing options out there.  Nobody is making you do it too.