DISCLAIMER

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author. They are not intended to replace medical advice from
a licensed healthcare professional. So, don't be stupid. Talk to your healthcare provider and don't rely on the
Internet for your medical needs.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

E is Six Months Old!!!

Wow, who can believe half a year has already passed! I really think I'm starting to figure this whole motherhood thing out. E has learned a lot, but she's also taught me a lot.

1. Babies give the worst "purple nurples" of anyone. Cut the nails.
2. Eating solid food means less pumping/breastfeeding.
3. Eating solid food also means the cute poopy diapers of breastfeeders is replaced with rotten dingleberries that smell like death.
4. Sitting up for the first time is good.... until the falling-over for the first time.
5. Playtime encompasses many more activities now than it did at three months!
6. Teething means even more drool than I ever thought possible. I have to pack at least 5 bibs for every outing of one hour or more.
7. Babies do not have "allergies" - or at least, it can't be detected until after one year. If she has a snotty nose, it's because she has contracted some vile illness from the cesspool they call daycare.
8. Babies suck on everything. This includes (but is not limited to) bottles, pacifiers, boobies, fingers, toes, stuffed animals, blankets, car keys, plants, real animals (if they get close enough), and germ-infested toys from daycare.
9. Although she thinks it's hilarious, do not let E stick her hands in your mouth or you will get sick (see number 8).
10. She is, despite any disgusting diapers, vomit, drool, infestation of disease, anger, tears, or sneezing directly in your face, the CUTEST little thing ever.

Next is baby-proofing the house in anticipation of pending independent mobility. She has not yet decided to crawl anywhere, but she watches us with those eyes that seem to say, "I'm waiting for you to look the other way, and when you look back, I'll be halfway down the street." I'm SO looking forward to that.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Babbling

Pregnancy seems like a lifetime ago. My baby will be five months old in a mere 6 days. She was so small and you could easily cuddle her completely within your arms. Now an arm or leg tends to dangle beyond my embrace. Sometimes she pulls my hair or pinches my flesh (the non-muscular part just above the elbow on the back of the arm, for example). Sometimes she slaps me in the face or scratches my eyes. She's going to be the devil incarnate someday. For now, she's a sweet little angel and I can't get enough of her.

Tonight when I put her to bed, she "talked" to herself for no less than an hour. I think she finally passed out about fifteen minutes ago. She babbles, coos, giggles, belly-laughs, grins, drools, chews, and does something that sounds like a heavy breather on the other end of a phone line. She also does that noise that young Forrest does when his principal leaves his home after some school-admission coitus with Mommy. She keeps us laughing all the time.

These are some milestones:
1. Laughed aloud.
2. Rolled over (completely by accident, four times in a row, and not since).
3. Held head up while on tummy.
4. Took a few pretty nasty face-bumps while on tummy... but survived.
5. Copied Mom and Dad sticking out their tongues and making noises.
6. Giggled when tickled.
7. Smiled for the camera (and now will not STOP being a ham in front of one).
8. Scooted in reverse (only once).
9. Kicked so hard the crib dropped down to the lowest level (this was scary, and the crib manufacturer should put out a warning).
10. Went to daycare and did super.
11. Had some photos taken by someone OTHER than relatives.
12. Flew to NC.
13. Rode 10 hours in a car over 2 days and didn't squall.
14. Was able to ride face-out in the front carrier.
15. Learned some cause-and-effect (i.e., if I push this button, animal noises come out).

These are just a few. We're so proud, as if you couldn't tell. Maybe if life stops being so... dominating... I can post more about postpartum stuff. Here's a picture for now. Not super-recent, but she's so sweet and dreamy I couldn't resist.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Motherhood, the joys and woes

E will be three months old tomorrow. Three months, and wow, have I learned!

1. Child care is expensive and popular. Put your name on the wait list before your baby is born or else you'll be on a year-long wait list for the inexpensive place while you have the privilege of paying $1,000 a month for the alternative.
2. Once you hit the 2-month mark, you get to see smiles that are directed at you, and not just those cute dreamy ones they have by accident.
3. If you don't want your baby to be addicted to TV, don't let him or her near it. The moving colors and lights are too attractive to ignore. My baby loves March Madness. Let's hope college basketball isn't too damaging to her developing mind.
4. Air travel with an infant can be scary, demanding of your marital relationship, draining on all your mental and physical resources, but rewarding when you get complimented on the unexpectedly quiet and reasonably good behavior of your little traveler.
5. Moving with a baby sucks, but if it's a local move and you have friends who will help out, it's not so bad.
6. Some Easter bonnets are better left in the 19th century with Little House on the Prairie.
7. Jealous cats will poop on your rug unless you pet them once in a while.
8. The generosity of friends and loved ones will never cease to amaze me!
9. Once babies get "grabby" it might be a good time for a shorter hairstyle. Or lots of updo's, ponytails, or other devices to avoid torture.
10. Keep those little fingernails trimmed, or someone might call Social Services and report you for the little scratches all over your baby's face.

These are only a few. Today was E's first day in a child care facility. It almost broke my heart to let her go, but she was really good. She wasn't fussy, she didn't get upset when I left her, and apparently was quite content during her five-hour stay. I will take her again tomorrow, and then it's her daddy's turn. I somehow think he will not handle it as well. As my grandmother said, "He's foolish over that baby." And she's right.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Today is the Due Date - Labor was like...

Today is the day our lovely daughter (referred to in this blog as E) was supposed to arrive. Okay, well really it's the estimated delivery date (EDD) based off the last period I had. I'm really glad she arrived a week ago. It was snowing today, nasty and gross out. School was cancelled, the roads were muck. I couldn't imagine trying to head to the hospital in this condition!

My hometown paper also published a story about E's arrival after recognition of my alma mater spread through the blog sites back home. They even included a link back to the west-coast newspaper's spread at the bottom of the online version of the article. I got a letter from the alumni association and a magnet that read "Future Pirate" on it as well!

Pictures will follow, but here are a few notes about labor and delivery:
* My contractions did not start until 3am on the 31st of December, and I barely noticed them as anything special until they started to actually feel uncomfortable, by about noon.
* Walking made them worse, which was a sure sign that they were REAL and not "practice contractions" (Braxton Hicks).
* I felt a trickle around 2:30pm, and was unsure if I'd peed myself so I went to the bathroom about 3 times in a row until I couldn't pee anymore. I still felt the trickle, so I knew I'd sprung a leak.
* I called the L&D ward around 3:30 to let them know, and they said for me to come in for a checkup. Expecting I'd just be sent back home, I didn't make snacks for Dev or pack the books we were going to read while waiting for labor to really get going.
* By the time we arrived at around 4:15, my contractions were 1 1/2 to 2 minutes apart and I was 4cm dilated. They admitted me at about 5:30.
* Things progressed quickly. The nurse anesthetist was called in to do my epidural at about 7:00. It took her six attempts because apparently, if you do a lot of situps, it makes the epidural space (between the vertebrae) very tight. My poor husband was holding me in position for the big needle, but after the third or fourth attempt, he started feeling funny and needed to sit down, so a nurse took over.
* The midwife broke the secondary bag of waters (yes, there are two layers) after the epidural kicked in because that makes contractions get serious in a hurry. I felt warm water gushes periodically with each contraction after the initial "sploosh." It was hard not to be grossed out.
* I had to get a "booster" in the epidural IV around 9:30 or 10:00 because the contractions had begun to feel like they did before I got the epidural in. Unfortunately I don't remember the name of the drug but I'm sure it was some variant of morphine. I could still feel the contractions but they felt like pressure rather than pain.
* At around 11:45, they told me to start pushing. It really does feel like you need to poop, as I was told. You have to hold your breath and push in 10-second intervals, usually three pushes grouped together.
* At 12:33am on January 1, 2008, E entered the world as the first baby of the New Year in our county.

I cannot express to you the feelings I had. Neither can my husband. He did not cut the cord. However, since the baby's sex was a surprise, we got the opportunity to announce it to the birthing room once she came out. It was just amazing. And it all went super fast compared to most rookie mommies. That's why the nurses called me a "Rock Star" during the labor and delivery. That plus the extended epidural effort, I suppose. But if you want something bad enough, you'll endure most anything to get it.

More to follow as time permits. She is awake and alert and ready to have dinner now, so I gotta run.

Friday, January 4, 2008

She's here!

We had a beautiful new year baby. Since she was the FIRST, she was already on the Internet before she was even 24 hours old! More pictures and all the gory details to follow, but it's our first full day home from the hospital and we need the rest!